Too Much to Forget
by Panabelle
Summary: Sequel to Too Young to Die: Pan can't believe her luck...now to seek revenge, and keep Daddy blissfully ignorant.
1. Chapter 1

Disclaim-her: I don't own DBZ or DBGT. But I own enough merchandize to ensure the fortunes of those who do!  
  
A/N: YOU LOVE ME! YOU REALLY LOVE ME! Thanks and mad props to all who reviewed, I feel so loved! I honestly had no intention to continue the story, but once I read your pleas for the sequel, I just couldn't help myself. So read on and enjoy....I'll try and write something faster next time...but I don't think I'll have the motivation to write unless all you peeps out in Dragonland REVIEW. So, please, REVIEW!  
  
BTW-Anything in *'s, is a thought. Anything between *~* is a flashback. Anything between ~'s, needs emphasis (i.e. You ~can't~ be serious...). Ok, you should get this ok.  
  
*************************************  
  
Too Much to Forget  
  
  
  
  
Pan smiled to herself as Trunks whimpered.  
  
They hadn't been lying there long, maybe an hour.  
  
She snuggled closer to him, pushing her nose into his while shirt. He smelled like sweat and ice cream. The thought brought a faint smile to her lips as she finally put words to his scent-she been trying for 14 years to do so. It would never matter how long he worked in that damned office, he would always smell like sweat-and not the stinky kind that made your nose curl up in disgust and made your eyes water. The sweet kind, the way you smell after working outside on a warm summer morning, with dewdrops on your clothes and the lazy June breeze in your head and on your cheeks.  
  
"Dende, save me," Trunks breathed, his body stiff and tense, his arm crushing her to his side.  
  
She smiled.  
  
When she'd left for California four years ago, Trunks and Bra and Goten had been happy for her, but all firmly stated that they wanted her here-at home-for college. Her father had been pissed as hell, she remembered his tail spontaneously regrowing when he'd learned she'd applied to a college over 3000 miles away, without his permission. But once she'd explained to him that it was a good school offering her a full tuition scholarship, he'd complied, on the condition that she come visit as often as possible.  
  
"I will, Daddy, don't worry."  
  
Then she made a complete turn around.  
  
*~*  
"Pan!" Bra cried. "You can't stay over there!"  
  
"And why not?"  
  
"Pan, ~four years~? With~out~ coming home?"  
  
She sighed. Her blue haired friend just didn't get it.  
  
"Bra, my dad allowed me to stay on the spaceship even after I shanghai-ed it into space. Didn't have much of a choice, but he allowed it, and was proud of it in the end. This is the same deal. I'm not staying there indefinitely, just long enough to find myself."  
  
"What do you mean 'find yourself', Panny?"  
  
She froze, hearing Trunks enter the room.  
  
"Don't you knock?!" Bra yelled, glaring at him, her contempt enough to make even Vegeta flinch.  
  
Trunks ignored her. "Panny?"  
  
She felt her cheeks turning pink despite her efforts not to blush. She lowered her eyes to Bra's bedspread, picking at a string in the quilting. She couldn't bring herself to meet his eyes. She'd had a crush on him for so long, that it was almost too much to bear any longer. How could she tell him that she was leaving to find out how to live without him?  
  
"Panny?" he repeated.  
  
She sighed, then spoke, her voice quite and strained.  
  
"I just don't feel like I belong here-I-I mean I ~do~, but...Everyone sees me as a little kid-'Kakarot's brat's brat', 'Gohan's little girl'. I'm not allowed to fight simply because I'm a girl, and yet, no one treats me like a girl except for my dad...Mom does, but frilly pink dresses belong on Marron, not me." She sighed again, pulling off her bandana and picking at the now fraying hem. It was so old, that it was a wonder it hadn't fallen apart yet. "I don't know. For the first time in my life, I'm lost-utterly and completely. I just...just need to figure out who I am because right now I'm a bunch of jumbled up pieces that refuse to pretend to fit together any longer."  
  
"Oh Pan!" Bra cried, throwing her arms around her. "You know that's not..."  
  
Trunks gently cut in between the two, pulling Pan to her feet and wrapping his arms around her in a small, brotherly hug. At first she thought he understood, but then he opened his mouth.  
  
"Panny, you don't have to move to the states to figure out who you are, I know-"  
  
"No you don't!" She whirled away from him, turning back and fuming at both Briefs, standing her ground almost as if in battle. "You don't know! Neither of you! I can't stay here! Too many-I can't-promises can't be kept-I-can't forget-too much-leaving to forget-to-"  
  
She was almost on the verge of hysterics. Bra sat on the edge of her bed, her back straight and shoulders stiff. Trunks had only nodded though.  
  
"You're leaving to find out how to live without Goku, right Panny?" he whispered quietly, his eyes sad and dejected like a child who's been told no cookie until after dinner.  
  
Pan's shoulders slumped. *No you idiot, to find out how to live without ~you~.*  
  
"Yeah, I guess," she whispered, knowing that neither would ever understand.  
*~*  
  
Two days later at the airport, she's said good-bye to each of them in turn, each wishing her the best of luck in her searching, each expressing regret at her departure.  
  
"Dende, please let me survive this."  
  
Pan's smile grew broader and she tried to conceal it in his chest.  
  
But she hadn't had to leave at all.  
  
*Have you ever felt like a part of you had been kidnapped and held for ransom?*  
  
Trunks had felt the same way she had-or at least seemed to now. When he'd kissed her...  
  
When he'd kissed her, her whole world had been turned upside down and inside out-everything she'd thought she'd found back in California had disappeared as quickly as dandelion seeds on the wind. She'd though she'd found her individuality, her own feet to stand on, she'd thought she'd found herself.  
  
But she hadn't. She'd found who she thought she could be: a young fighter, fresh and beautiful, able to wear whatever the hell she wanted, no matter the occasion, able to keep her head...able to live without Trunks by her side, without him as her someday-love, with him as nothing more then a brotherly best friend.  
  
But with that kiss, all of that fell down like a house of cards in a thunderstorm, and she'd found what she'd wasted four years looking for.  
  
Herself.  
  
Of course she'd found her individuality-but she'd always had it.  
  
Of course she'd found her feet and steady ground-but she'd always had those too.  
  
And of course she'd found out that she could live without Trunks as her mate-but she didn't want to.  
  
"Dende, I know you haven't always liked me, but please don't let Gohan kill me!"  
  
It was too much, she had to laugh this time. He'd been praying for over an hour, at first silently, but now out loud, and hearing him only helped to prove the ridiculousness of his prayers.  
  
"Pan!"  
  
Sitting up, she covered her hand with her mouth, rather useless really, with as hard as she was laughing, pushing stray hair out of her face.  
  
He looked so hurt as he propped himself up on his elbows, so abused, dejected, and lost that it only made her laugh even harder.  
  
"Pan, it's not funny!"  
  
She smiled through the tears squeezing out the corners of her eyes. "Y-yes, it-it is!" she gasped.  
  
He seemed to take that as a personal affront to his pride, because his cobalt blue eyes narrowed and his face darkened. "No, Pan, it isn't."  
  
Swallowing her laughter (and nearly choking on it in the process), she met his glare and blatantly mocked him. "Yes, Trunks, it is."  
  
Almost without warning, he launched himself at her, pinning her to the ground, his fingers playing lightly over the sides.  
  
"You want something funny? I'll give you something funny!" he cried, tickling her, both of them rolling and tumbling in the sand, laughing and horsing around.  
  
"~Tr-Trunks!~" she laughed, the pain in her sides almost unbearable, but sweetly so. Damn him! He knew exactly where to tickle her to get the best reactions! "~Trunks, stop-stop!~"  
  
Abruptly he did, and a heavy and unfamiliar weight wedged her between itself and the sand. As the tears of laughter cleared from her eyes, she saw Trunks's face, his cheeks pink, his eyes wide. She caught her own face catching fire again as he quickly pushed himself off of her and turned to face the ocean.  
  
Pushing herself up with her elbows, she studied him. That hair of his had always lead him victims to many a prank, and many more jokes. But no other hair color would fit him-not blue, not black. And besides, with Bulma and Vegeta, it made perfect sense. Bruises were black and blue, but they weren't the really painful kind unless they were black, blue, and ~purple~. Besides, the analogy fit the Briefs family perfectly. Laughing at the thought, Pan pulled herself forward and ducked under Trunks arm, leaning against him.  
  
Only to have him stand up and dump her into the sand.  
  
Confused and hurt, she pushed herself up and looked after him. His back was straight, his neck tight. He walked stiffly, as if he were about to do something he didn't want to do.  
  
Or had already done something he regretted deeply.  
  
Pan froze.  
  
She'd seen him like this a few other times, always when he realized how big of a mistake he was making. Every time, it tore him apart, and she always felt elated, simply because there was one less bimbo in her way-although she had felt a little bit of sorrow in Marron's case...but this time, ~she~ was the bimbo.  
  
He stopped at the base of the dune where they'd watched the stars, where she'd let him see the darkest and tortured depths of her soul. He looked up at the sky, in the general direction of Dende's lookout, and whispered something to the stars.  
  
Pan ground her teeth, hating herself for allowing herself to think that they could really overcome the age difference, that he could really overcome himself...the damned womanizing bastard.  
  
He knelt, then fell back onto his rear, dusting off his feet, then shaking the sand off of his socks.  
  
Mentally, she kicked herself, kicked herself for being so stupid as to think he had changed, to think that he'd be mature enough to see what she'd grown into, to think that he'd be mature enough to take a relationship seriously.   
  
Physically, she clenched her hands into fits inside of her overly-long sleeves, ignoring the pain as her nails popped through her flesh.  
  
"Trunks?" she called, hurt, but not letting it show. If he heard her, he didn't respond. Time seemed to slow, she watched as each grain of sand fell from his sock and joined the other grains on the ground, all of the other poor schmucks that Trunks had left in his wake, all of the other poor souls she knew she was joining.  
  
"Trunks, what's wrong?" she braved. But she didn't move, didn't cross to him-didn't trust herself to stand without sobbing.  
  
He shoved his feet into his sneakers, his fingers fumbling with the laces.  
  
"Trunks? Seriously, what's eating you?"  
  
She swallowed thickly, ignoring the sticky ball of tears that had wedged itself in her throat, ignored how she couldn't feel her heart, couldn't hear it pounding. She knew that it was dead now, there was no doubting it.  
  
Still, he ignored her, succeeded in tying one shoe and grabbed the laces on the other.  
  
"Trunks?"  
  
~Now~ his head jerked up, ~now~ he heard her, ~now~ he realized why she was just sitting where he'd left her, half tumbled in the sand, her bandana gripped in a tight fist, her hair falling over her face. She must have looked pathetic, her eyes terrified and wide, the tiny muscle under her right cheek twitching as she tried not to cry.  
  
She cursed her weakness, she hadn't meant to let her voice betray her. She didn't want him to realize how much this was killing her, she just wanted to know why.  
  
Their eyes locked, and, though paralyzed as she felt, Pan pushed herself up.  
  
*I'm sorry*, his eyes seemed to say. *I'm sorry to have to do this to you-believe me, tonight wasn't supposed to have turned out this way at all.*  
  
She understood. Quietly, she stood, gathering her shattered dignity and tarnished pride about her, and walked to join him, quietly picking up her shoes and her socks, not bothering to put them on as she started through the sand to the parking lot.  
  
Trunks stared at her, watching blood drip down her fingers and onto her snow white socks, stuffed inside her tattered sneakers.  
  
Pan blinked back the tears, not about to cry in front of him, not about to give him that satisfaction.  
  
  
A/N: Don't you just hate me? Hee hee hee! Bwa ha ha ha ha! *maniacal laughter ensues* I'll try and get the next chap out within a couple of days, I just need to find time-stupid term paper. *growls at homework and geology teacher* Anywayz, don't give up! I can't leave Trunks and Pan like that! Especially without interference from Gohan!  
  
BTW, I'm writing this in a trilogy fashion: Too Young to Die, Too Much to Forget, and then whatever the third one turns out to be....but all you guyz gotsta review for me to write that one. ;P  
  
-Panabelle ;P  



	2. Chapter 2

Disclaimer: I own nothing of DBZ, although I do own a chibi Trunks action figure.  
  
A/N: Thank you to the five people who REVIEWed. To the rest of you...you're mean. Please REVIEW. I like very much when people REVIEW. So please, REVIEW! Anywayz, this chap is dedicated to fluffy, who has REVIEWed everything I've posted (Thank you! Thank you thank you thank you!), and to my new friend, who merely signed her name as "grrrrr".  
  
BTW once again: anything in *'s is a thought. Anything in ~'s needs emphasis. Anything in *~* is a flashback. Get it? Good...on to the second chapter.  
  
**********************  
Too Much to Forget  
Chapter 2  
  
  
  
Behind her, Trunks stayed rooted to the spot, cringing at what he had done.  
  
"Pan...look, it's not-"  
  
"Are you taking me home or am I taking myself?"  
  
Her voice was flat, almost emotionless, but not quite. It was sad, her voice. Too sad to be emotionless.  
  
She heard him sigh behind her.  
  
"Look, Panny, it's not like that at all...it's just, well..."  
  
Rolling her eyes, she turned around and shot a challenge at him. At his pride.  
  
"Scared my daddy's gonna hurt you?"  
  
He flinched away from her words, hesitated, then nodded.  
  
She snorted in disgust.  
  
"Son of Vegeta, scared of a Son? Ha!" Her voice was cruel, nasty, and cold.  
  
Trunks ground his teeth. "Listen, Panny, don't go away angry, alright? I know you-ok? Just, don't go away-"  
  
"Why not? Why the hell not? Why, the hell, not?"  
  
Trunks ground his teeth, his jaw tight.  
  
"Panny, you don't understand-"  
  
She whirled on him, storming back to him, her eyes blazing with suppressed anger, anger so hot it dried her tears and made her eyes water.  
  
"Don't 'Panny' me, Trunks Vegeta Briefs, Mr. President, son of Vegeta, heir to the saiyan throne- ~no good Dende damned cock sucking bastard!~" she cried, unable to keep her anger lidded any longer. But she kept her tears in-she had too much pride not to.  
  
Trunks grew stiff and his eyes flashed, the regret in them now completely gone. He grabbed the front of her jacket, not caring if he hurt her anymore.  
  
"What the hell right do you have," he growled, his teeth bared, his voice low and gravelly, his eyes narrowed and as hot as hellfire, "to call me a-"  
  
"Every right, in every world," she hissed back, her voice low and sinister, her own teeth bared and flashing in the moonlight. "So don't start with me, pretty boy, or I just might have to hurt ya."  
  
He tightened his grip on her jacket. He was shaking-she was shaking-he was so angry.  
  
"Do you want to know why I'm doing this Panny?" he whispered, his voice threatening but softer now. He still held her in the air, still shook with anger, but he wasn't trying to cut her head off with lasers of death shot from his eyes any longer.  
  
"Sure," she replied, sarcastically. "Let's see what reasons you have for wanting yourself put on my shit list-and Daddy's hit list."  
  
He flinched at the mention of Gohan, but held firm in his stance. Gently, he set her down, taking a step back so that he wasn't so close to her in case she took a swing at him-from this distance, he could at least block her.  
  
"I'm not going to lie to you Panny..." He trailed off, struggled with himself, then looked her in the eye. "I used-in all honesty I-" He cut off sharply, then narrowed his gaze at her. "I just can't see 'us' happening. As great a kid you are, I don't think we could work out ~that~ way."  
  
It hit her like a slap in the face, a fist to the gut, and an elbow to the back, all at once. It took all she had not to stagger back and start crying, or pass out.  
  
*As great a kid you are...great...you are...kid...you're a great kid.*  
  
*That's all I am to him?* she whispered inside her own mind. *A kid? But-he-and he-we-I can't believe that-*  
  
She cut off the thought and nodded to him.  
  
"And you're still a bastard." With that, she spun around on her heel and started walking again.  
  
"Pan, wait-"  
  
"Are you taking me home, or am I taking myself?"  
  
******************  
  
A/N: hey, "grrrrr", don't kill me. I know that I'm evil and cruel and mean and all of the things you said before, simply because I keep leaving you with cliff hangers-sorry folks, but I love em too much! Now don't think that this is the end, 'cause it's not. I'm just getting the next section of this story posted now, before I get grounded for failing the term paper I still have the write...I'm sorry, but I find the plight of Trunks and Pan ~much~ more interesting then the geology of the Grand Canyon. Rocks don't interest me...don't ask why I'm taking geology because I can't tell you.  
  
Anywayz, I'll get the next section out ASAP, and it will be the final to this bit of my trilogy. Trilogy only if people review that is, I've only had five people review this story so far, and I'm feeling sad and dejected. Just like Pan! So come on ppl, REVIEW. PLEASE!!!!!  
  
BTW, visit my homepage, it's gots more of my messed up writing (not fanfic, but not the point). It's at: www.angelfire.com/dbz/storytellers Yes, I know, blatant advertising on my part. Sue me, and I won't post the next chapter.  



	3. Chapter 3

Hey! Guess what! I don't own DB-anything! Except for my Chibi Trunks action figure...he keeps all of the bad things away and tears my flunk'ed tests into teeny tiny bits so that I don't have to feel so guilty about how I worked on this instead of studying...  
  
A/N: Guess what! My crappy term paper be over and done with! Although I did flunk a test, that's not the point, I still stand a ~chance~ at passing the class...ugh. Anywayz, due to the prodding of Evil Child (who turned out to be grrrrr by the way), I gots the third and final chap for TM2F out. Yes, this means that I am done with fanfics, forever, unless you REVIEW!!!! I felt so unloved, this fic-the entire thing!-has only gotten 9 REVIEWs. Fluffy consoled me and made me feel better, but I still don't care. No one REVIEWed. Please, review. Otherwise, no more fics from Panabelle. Now, on with the fic.  
  
BTW: in case you've forgotten, anything in *'s is a thought or phrase stuck in the head of a character. These thingies: ~'s, symbolizing something needing emphasis. There are no flashbacks in this, so don't worry about that.  
  
********************************  
  
Too Much to Forget  
Chapter 3  
  
*As great a kid you are, I don't think we could work out ~that~ way...*  
  
Pan settled back into the seat cushion, thankful that Trunks had left the top of his black capsule convertible down-the raging wind that roared past them made the silence less unbearable.  
  
She was pissed, she wouldn't pretend she wasn't, but she still kept the rage inside, letting it fester where Trunks couldn't see it, making sure to keep her ki at a low and stable level. A level too low to be normal, just to freak him out, and not too high, so that he wouldn't know he'd gotten to her.  
  
*As great a kid you are...*  
  
She shook her head to chase his voice out of her mind and flomped heavily back into the leather upholstered seat, crossing her arms over her chest and slamming her foot into the dashboard, nearly sending it into the glove department.  
  
Trunks winced as he heard the hard plastic crack, but stayed quiet.  
  
Pan snorted as he glanced at his watch and gripped the wheel tighter.  
  
"Afraid my Daddy's gonna kill ya?" she teased sarcastically, her voice nasty and cruel. Trunks grimmaced, but kept his irritation to himself.  
  
"Pan-"  
  
"Aw...poor Trunks is afraid that my daddy is going to rip his head off and ~eat it~!"  
  
"~PAN!~" he roared over the wind. She blinked, startled. "~No~, I'm ~not~ afraid of what your ~father~ is going to do to me-alright, yes I am, but only because I'm afraid that his daughter is going to be a spoiled little ~shit~ and go crying to him."  
  
That got her angry.  
  
Her ki dipped, and the car swerved.  
  
"Bastard."  
  
"Pan, grow up and stop acting like a little ki-"  
  
"I did grow up Trunks. A few hours ago, you noticed that, but apparently your dogdamned ego had to get in the way."  
  
He ground his teeth, his knuckles white on the wheel. She heard it crack under the pressure he held it with, but he restrained himself before it shattered. "Panny, would you please, just, ~listen~ to m-"  
  
"Just shut up and drive."  
  
Happily, though still put out, his ki erratic with fear and worry, he complied.  
  
Her house rose into view over the treetops, her the dome of her grandmother's house shining brightly like the promise of a dream in the moonlight. How often had Pan lain out there under the stars, holding make-believe conversations with Trunks in her head? How many nights had she sought refuge there when she feared her grades wouldn't pass her father's inspection-though always the next morning, he'd have carried her back into the house and put her in bed, with a glass of apple juice waiting on her bedside, a note taped to it that read "so long as you tried, Panny, that's all that matters"? How many times had she fled a terrible break up to sit on that roof, only to have Trunks come and coax her back into joining the social circle known as life?  
  
Too damn many.  
  
But she knew she'd be out there again tonight.  
  
*****************************  
  
A/N: Yes, this is the end of this fic. *cringes* DON'T HURT ME!!! Instead, REVIEW, and I'll write another fic to this 'lil trilogy I have going here. Otherwise, I won't, and you just get to look at this promise. *Hee hee hee* Aren't I evil? ; P Anywayz, life is kinda hectic, so that's why it'll probably take a while to start work on the last part to my 3-sie. You didn't actually think I'd leave it like that, did you?  
  
I might.  
  
Well, that's it. OH! And a note to anybody who flamed me for my treatment of Gohan: I DON'T HATE HIM! I DON'T THINK HE'S THE DEVIL EITHER! I just have a thing about the over-protective daddy bit, I mean, Pan's his only daughter, and Trunks is a man-whore. (I mean that in the most loving of ways. ; P ) Besides, the fic where I keep getting all of the "Why do you hate Gohan?!" REVIEWs, is from Trunks point of view. I can't help it if Trunks was freaking out!  
  
Ok, that's it. REVIEW, and I'll be inclined to get the third of my 3-sie out faster. ; P  
-Panabelle ; P  



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